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So the man
gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the
field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the
man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the
man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh.
Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he
brought her to the man. The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of
my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” For this
reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and
they will become one flesh.
The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
~ Genesis 2:20-25
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Wedding Ceremony
The Eucharist (mass), is celebrated only when
both parties are Catholic. To have the Mass with only one of the couple
receiving communion would be contrary to the whole theology of the unity of the
couple and would make the non-catholic appear as a spectator at his or her own
marriage. This would not be appropriate.
All couples will be given a choice of the scripture readings for their own
ceremony. These choices should be brought to the wedding rehearsal.
The couple should choose two people to read the
first and second readings. The priest always reads the gospel. The readers
should come to the rehearsal to become familiar with the sound system in the
church.
All the liturgical books now recommend that both
the bride and the groom should greet the guests as they come into the church and
that the bride and groom process to the altar together. The practice of having
the groom appear from the front of the church is contrary to our understanding
of the sacrament of marriage. Both the bride and the groom are the principal
celebrants of this sacrament and thus should enter together.
The practice of giving the bride away as some
sort of commodity because the groom has paid a dowry belongs to the past ages.
And the idea that the bride and groom should not see each other on the day of
the wedding is hocus-pocus and has nothing to do with faith. It is silly
superstition. It is also recommended that both the parents of the groom and of
the bride should join the procession.
We strongly recommend only two principal
witnesses, the maid of honour and the best man. Extra bridesmaids or extra
virgins in case the groom tires of the bride is really not appropriate.
Nonetheless no more than four bridesmaids and ushers. Any more than this tends
to make the wedding more of a theatrical production than a religious ceremony.
Flower girls and ring bearers should be at least
four years old. Otherwise they disrupt the ceremony and this is not cute.
Weddings are not about cute. Take Ann Landers advice and eliminate these small
people altogether.
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Music
David Jafelice is the Minister of music in the
parish and he should be consulted regarding appropriate music for you wedding.
He will also assist you in the planning of the liturgy for this most important
date in your life. His phone number is 416-696-1228.
Please also see
page 3 - Music for the Sacrament of Marriage that
David prepared. |

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Flowers
These are up to the couple, we only ask that you do
not over do it. You may feel free to take the flowers to the reception if you
wish. If there is more than one wedding on your day and you wish to share the
flowers with another bride. Ask the priest for the appropriate phone number to
contact the other bride. If you order an arch of flowers, it must be placed at
the back of the church. No large displays of flowers may be placed in the
aisles. Both these and the arches, restrict the view of your guests and make a
meaningful liturgy almost impossible. Pew bows with flowers are quite
acceptable. |
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Photography
The photographer should check with the priest prior
to the wedding for any necessary instructions. Guest may take all the pictures
they like as long as they remain in their pews. Video is permitted but this
should be done from a fixed position using a tripod. |
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Confetti and Rice
Absolutely forbidden in the church itself. Out side
we suggest grass seed. |
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Rehearsals
Arranged with Erin Wrightson – phone 830-9827. Erin
will do the rehearsal and return for the wedding itself to co-ordinate the
ceremony. There is a fee of $100.00 for Erin for the service she provides. |
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Fees – Stipends
There are no set fees or charges for the church,
but it is customary to make a donation to the church and to give a cash gift to
the priest. The usual donation to the church is $300.00. The easiest way to do
this, as well as the
organist fee, is to bring appropriate envelopes to the
rehearsal and give them to Erin. |
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If you would like a hard copy of "Marriage at St. John's", download a .pdf
version of this page and the previous one. Right click the button and select
"save target as...". Otherwise, your priest will give you this information at
your first meeting.
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If you would like your wedding pictures to appear on this page, please contact
the
webmaster.
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The information on the Marriage Pages is
Copyright © 2011 St. John Chrysostom
Church, Newmarket, Ontario.
All rights reserved. Unauthorised
reproduction is prohibited
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